We are not marsupials.

Lovelies, Sister Mary went out adventuring this weekend and after the troublesome fashion no-no’s, I regret even venturing outside the convent.  I saw ladies wearing only half a shirt and I was left wondering if they paid full price for that or if they got it at a half off shop.  (Get it?  A half off shop?)  And the cut offs with the pockets hanging below the cutoff line….just what is the point? Then there were the men in flip flops, or man flops as I call them.  Yes, I know that Jesus wore sandals, but they were more like a man-dal and not a flop.  A flip flop says “Hi, I’m going to the shower.”  A Birkenstock says, “At least I tried.”  Thus why we call them “Jesus kicks.”

So back to the main offender.  What I found to be the most offensive in fashion don’ts was the fanny pack.  

First, I’d like to point out that no one should be accentuating that area unless you are Twiggy.

Second, no one has a “fanny.” We have butts.

Third, to our friends across the pond, fanny is slang for female parts so some of us do in fact have fannies and maybe that is the joke that we just aren’t getting.  Well, Sister Mary just clued you in, so please for the love of all that is good, STOP THE MADNESS!

So I don’t care if your pack is Gucci, Prada or if you purchased it at Target, I really do not want to see another one of these things on the street.  We are not marsupials; we do not have pouches.  We are mammals and we are meant to carry things in a pocketbook, a backpack, a respectable handbag, or God forbid in cargo shorts aka purse pants.  

Until next time, stay fashionable.
SM